The Dark Chocolate Kind of Love

by Lori Wilson

Last week marked my birthday - Valentine's Day. I've always loved this day, but not for the reasons the stores would have me believe. Not the sugary-sweet version with its carnival of pink cards and candy hearts. I'm thinking of something richer, more complex. The dark chocolate kind of love - the kind that's an acquired taste, that reveals its depth slowly, that has a little bitterness alongside the sweetness.

I think about St. Valentine, that third-century martyr who defied an emperor to celebrate the marriages of soldiers forbidden to wed. He loved people enough to risk everything, to do what he knew was right even when the rules - the powerful, official rules - told him not to. He paid for that love with his life on February 14th, beheaded for the crime of honoring love when the empire demanded otherwise.

What a legacy. What fierce, dangerous, beautiful love.

I wonder how often God invites us to this same kind of love - the kind that doesn't play it safe, that refuses to hide behind "the rules say I shouldn't." Because here's what I notice in myself: it's so easy to let an opportunity pass, to silence that quiet whisper in my heart by saying, "Someone knows better than I do. I should play it safe."

But what if that whisper is God speaking to me? What if the invitation to love - risky, counter-cultural, inconvenient love - is exactly where God is calling? And what if my default to "the rules" is really just fear dressed up as wisdom?

This is difficult work. It takes risk. It takes courage to love as St. Valentine did - to trust that God speaks to us personally, not just through official channels or safe choices. To believe that sometimes the most faithful thing we can do is defy what the world expects in order to honor what love requires.

My prayer this birthday is to stay open to how God invites me to love in this world. To recognize when I'm being called to be counter-cultural - not for the sake of rebellion, but for the sake of love. To have the courage to trust that God's whisper in my heart is real, even when it asks me to step outside the lines.

To love like St. Valentine. The dark chocolate kind of love that costs something.

Questions for Reflection

• Where do you feel invited to love in a way that might go against "the rules" - whether official policies, social expectations, or just what feels safe? What stops you from following that invitation?

• When have you hidden behind "the rules say I shouldn't" to avoid the risk of loving boldly? Looking back, what was really at stake? What were you most afraid of?

• Can you recall a time when you trusted God's whisper over conventional wisdom? What happened? What did you learn about God's voice in your life?

• If you truly believed God was speaking to you about how to love - even when it feels counter-cultural or risky - what might change in your daily choices? Where would you begin?

• What's the difference for you between sugary-sweet love and dark chocolate love? Which are you being invited into right now?

Prayer

God of fierce and tender love, You who speak in whispers that ask me to risk everything -

Give me the courage of St. Valentine, who loved boldly when the rules said stop, who trusted You more than the empire.

Help me recognize the invitations I'm hiding from, the times I use "safety" and "rules" to avoid the costly work of loving as You love.

Teach me to trust that You speak to me - yes, to me - and that Your whisper is worth every risk.

Let me taste the dark chocolate kind of love: rich, complex, real, with courage mixed into the sweetness.

And when I'm afraid, remind me: Love is always worth it. You are always trustworthy.

Amen.